Hey you guys. There’s Bears football today. REAL. BEARS. FOOTBALL. I can’t even contain my giddy excitement. Can’t. Even. If you haven’t been here before, we’ll have previews and reviews of every Bears game! And I try to stay objective. I’ll be honest with you, mostly. So let’s get to this preview!

(0-0) Buffalo Bills at
(0-0) Chicago Bears

What you Need to Know about the Bills Franchise

They’re like the Browns-Northeast, only without the LeBron drama for the past five years. The team is most known for going to four straight Super Bowls in the 90’s and losing all of them. They’re currently up for sale and have been in danger of moving to Toronto for a few seasons. They’re always good for a 4-2 start to the season… only to end up at 6-10.

Their Quarterback

E.J. Manuel, who I’m not sure is anything better than Josh Freeman-lite. He was raw last season when he could stay on the field, but he’s still a relatively unknown commodity.

Offensive Player to Watch

Sammy Watkins baby! The first round rookie was drafted thanks to a mega-trade by the Bills that saw them give away future first round picks, Subway gift cards, and a groundskeeper to be named later. The team thinks Watkins is the next Julio Jones, but it’s always difficult for a rookie wide receiver to make a immediate impact.

Defensive Player to Watch

Mario Williams. The defensive end had 13 sacks in 2013, rebounding after an initial disappointing season in Buffalo. He’s going to be a pain for Jermon Bushrod to block, but Jay needs to stay upright and gun-slinging.

The Odds

Chicago is a seven point home favorite.

How can Chicago win?

That new-fangled defensive line? It needs to get after E.J. Manuel.  And the Bills 1st round corner from 2012, Stephon Gilmore, won’t be playing today. In his place will be former Bear special teamer Corey Graham. Graham is fine if he’s your third or fourth corner… but if he’s starting? Oh hell no. Look for Marshall or Jeffery to abuse their former teammate.

How many heart attacks will Joe suffer?

C.J. Spiller is always good for a half a heart attack, and Sammy Watkins could break a few big plays against whatever safety happens to be out there for the Bears. I’m saying around three heart attacks.

The Prediction

I’m picking a Bears win to open the season. Around ten points or so. Manuel isn’t trustworthy enough out there to command several touchdown drives. And he’ll need them against this Bear offense.

Booyah! It’s time to start this season! Win or loss, try not to be too emotional later. It’s only week one.

Bear Down and Happy Jay Cutler Day!

*Interested in the rest of the league? Check out The Opening Drive!