The (Movie) Trailer Park: Deadpool

We’ve had leaked CGI test footage. We had a Comic-Con tease. We had a trailer for the trailer. And now… finally… we have a honest-to-god trailer for Deadpool, the lovechild of an aggressively persistent Ryan Reynolds and someone at FOX who doesn’t hate the world. For those of you not willing to live on the edge, there’s an all ages pansie trailer here. Everyone else?

Get ready to change pants.

Mostly Average Take:

– If you don’t want to read what is essentially the equivalent of expletive-filled drool, go ahead and skip the rest of this.I promise I won’t be offended. I was actually considering just not writing anything and letting the trailer speak for itself, but why they hell would you come here if I wasn’t going to fanboy all over your faces?

– Um… IT’S A FUCKING MIRACLE!!!!! After the debacle that was X-Men Origins: Wolverine, I was convinced we’d never get this Deadpool on screen. Ever. And now we do. I’m a little misty.

DP inhale

THE EYES ARE GLORIOUS

– We’re gonna get some pre-‘Pool action, so we’ll be seeing Ryan Reynolds’s mostly unaltered face. Okay, I can deal with that… for about five to eight minutes. After that I expect only mask or cancer face. They’re going to run through his tragic backstory, which of course leads him to the remnants of the Weapon X program (probably?), who can’t wait to x-periment on him and fuck him up.

– There are some rando/lesser known mutants/characters in this trailer, like Copycat, Angel Dust, and Ajax. And Negasonic Teenage Warhead. Ya know, just as well-known as Captain America.

– Wait, there’s Colossus! But it’s not Daniel Cudmore like in the other flicks. However, just like Deadpool himself, this looks more like comic Colossus than anything else I’ve seen. That means we have a X-man in this movie…so… crossover potential abounds.

DP Colossus

– Gina Carano gets to punch things. I’m a happy boy.

Honestly, there’s not a lot of negative for me right now. It’s a trailer, and it’s supposed to be nothing but good parts. If you can’t put together a two minute trailer that makes your action movie look good, then you probably have a crapper on your hands. I’m more than optimistic that Deadpool will be the movie we all want it to be.

In the meantime, watch that trailer again.

Fucking Chimichangas.

Deadpool is scheduled to hit theaters February 12, 2016.